1. Never Lie. Children are inquisitive and ask hundreds of questions daily. Majority of the time the question is "why" but nevertheless it's a question. I work hard at always answering truthfully. Whether the question is big or small I want to give a honest answer. Even if the answer gets tricky. Even if the answer is a total pain in my ass for the next three weeks (or how ever long it takes to get over it.)
2. Never Talk About a Child as if They are Not Standing Right There. This is more of a pet peeve of mine more than anything. I completely support sharing ideas, battles, and struggles with other parents, nannies, and care takers. However, I am absolutely sure that children do have ears! If you are seeking guidance be sure to do so appropriately and not in hearing range of your children. I also am absolutely sure that children are sensitive and always listening! If they are within earshot be careful not to hurt the child's pride or self-esteem. Even when their speech isn't fully developed, they are still listening. Quite honestly, they are probably listening more closely than normal because they are working on mastering a skill.
3. Children of All Ages Should Be Given Credit They Deserve. If not more credit! Children are smart. One attribute, among many, that I love about children are their creative ways of thinking. They often have intriguing and admiring viewpoints. If they aren't listening (which they are!) they are thinking! I don't ever want to assume that a child "doesn't get it." I don't ever want to talk "down to a child." I can come up with countless occasions where children, yes even toddlers, have shared useful insights, thoughts and suggestions to help me. I am not ashamed that I have, at times, been outsmarted by a preschooler.
4. Be Patient. I would constantly be throwing tantrums too if I was being misunderstood and being told no repeatedly for a whole year of my life! As a nanny, tantrums are hard. I feel fortunate that I am able to experience double the tantrums with the twins. It means double the patience, but also I am given an opportunity for a do-over when toddler 2 throws the same fit toddler 1 threw minutes ago and my reaction didn't go over so well. Try to remember they are people who also have wants and needs. Their wants may be playing "monster" or singing nursery rhymes over and over, but in their world that's important. Remember to listen and say YES as much as possible.
5. Challenge yourself to say yes. Why not let a toddler run up a flight of stairs so they can pretend they are a fire fighter a hundred times? If you have the time, say yes! During the times you have to say no, try to think of a positive way to say it. This is much harder than it seems. For example, today Mira and Ian wanted to play with sticks. (I said yes.) Mira and Ian wanted to run with sticks. (I started to say NO!) Instead of, "No running with sticks!" I changed my wording to "if you would like to run please put the sticks down." Previous lessons have taught me their reactions to "YES you can run. Please put the stick down." goes much more smoothly than, "No running with sticks." I struggle with this, but I know it works.
7. Try to Create as Much as A Schedule as Possible. I have also learned that small people like schedules. I believe it helps with miscommunications and misunderstandings. Most days, we start off with breakfast, play, get dressed, go somewhere, come home, watch Dora, eat lunch, read books, take a nap, wake up, have a snack, do a craft, read some books, play. Whenever we miss something the children notice and aren't necessarily okay with it. They like to know what is going on and because they are still in the learning process of how to communicate it is an easy way to make sure everyone is on the same page. It also helps to draw pictures! We love "mapping out" what we are doing.
1. Change diaper and put clothes on..
2. Snack
3. Get in the car to go to OMSI.
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